Wednesday, May 05, 2004

Yes, kids, it's that time again...

It's Bitch Time!

Now, this has been pissing me off for quite a while now.

The Moochers.

You know who you are. You stay somewhere, you eat the food, you watch the satellite television, you use the laundry detergent while doing your own laundry, you put your feet up...

Getting comfortable? Can I get you anything? Oh, let me pick up the snot rag you just threw onto the carpet I just vacuumed. Sure... I'll wash the dishes you soiled and just left in the sink for someone else to take care of for you. You want to watch something on the big screen television I'm still paying for and watch satellite programming you pay nothing for? Go right ahead! I wasn't planning on watching the program I've been waiting a week for.

Are you starting to get the idea?

Now, being a good person and believing in Good Karma, you allow these people to stay, not realizing they would TAKE OVER YOUR HOME and then make you feel UNCOMFORTABLE. IN YOUR OWN HOME!!! You start to get to this weird place where you're not wanting to hang out at home or you're actually afraid to change the channel on your own television in fear that others in the room (who don't pay for said TV or satellite programming) will actually get pissed at YOU! NEVERMIND THAT THEY PAY FOR ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!!!!

They don't pay for the food that you buy, the laundry detergent they use on their mountainous loads of laundry... now you're buying for "x" amount of people that you were not budgeted for! YOU pay anywhere from $40 - $90 for satellite or cable programming and YOU CAN'T WATCH ANYTHING BECAUSE THEY'VE COMMANDEERED THE REMOTE AND ARE HOLDING IT FUCKING HOSTAGE! Forget reading a book or writing in peace because these "TV Moochers" are usually the "Television Screamers" and then we get back into that whole other rant we were on the other day.

As someone who likes to think they have manners, tact, and respect for other people and their hospitality... I DON'T FUCKING GET IT!!???!!! I've stayed with people before for odd amounts of time and have ALWAYS chipped in my part. I eat the food... I PAY! I watch the TV... I SPLIT THE BILL! I do some laundry... I BRING MY OWN DETERGENT OR BUY NEW DETERGENT FOR ALL TO USE!!! Common decency people!

This is just the tip of the iceberg my friends. Do you realize that usually The Moochers "claim" to have no money to chip in, or say they shouldn't because they don't legally live at the address because they're only there temporarily (that's some bullshit, let me tell you - a year + is really not considered temporary. That's considered ROOMMATE!) THEN they slap you in the face by purchasing something that 1) they don't need and 2) know you want but now can't afford because you're supporting their lame ass! You start to feel like you're raising children you never gave birth to.

I'm rendered speechless at times when I actually think of what's going on in my own home! Call me a fucking pushover because I'm being FUCKING PUSHED OVER!!!

But, you can't do anything when The Moochers are family.

Fuck.

Till next time....

Sunday, May 02, 2004

Yes, I'm back. I'm sure you few out there who have read my blogs before are absolutely dumbfounded. Then again... were there any people out there who read my past blogs? Whatever. I've tried adding shit to this new blog. I've forgotten how, so no counters for now. No comments boxes... and yes, you have to live with the fact that I have no tech savvy and cannot download any other blog skins. Yes, we're dealing with the blogskins that do not appeal to the eye, if you know what I mean. But I digress...

Time to bitch.

Todays Bitch Session will discuss "Television Screamers". You know who you are. You "sports enthusiasts" ("sports freakshows" is more like it) who scream at the television at your ___________ (fill in desired sport here) team while they play in some all important game where your very lives hang in the balance. You scream orders at them. You yell out factoids. Plays. Fouls. Bad Refereeing. You name it, you yell it.

THEY CANNOT HEAR YOU!!!

No matter how loudly, fiercely, and passionately you scream, your _____________ (fill in desired sport again) team WILL NOT HEAR YOU! They will listen to their coach. They hear the fans at the actual game. They WILL NOT, I repeat WILL NOT HEAR YOU!!! If you want them to know how you feel, send an email or a letter or a fucking gift basket! Maybe they'll hear you. Otherwise...

SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!

Or at least tone it down. Some people are doing things around you. Reading, studying, sleeping, vegging... please. It's really not that important. Now I will say something that will anger all you "Television Screamers" out there... It's just a game. Calm down.

Thank you.

Stay tuned for the next bitch session....